Ummmmm….what?  What on Earth is going on here?  When the Simpsons used to make people laugh, they had a funny joke about Mr. Burns having every disease known to man.  The diseases balanced each other out and by virtue of the “Three Stooges syndrome”, Mr, Burns was actually perfectly healthy.  It’s an interesting concept.  Could a figure have everything wrong with it, but all those things would cancel each other out and the figure is actually good?  OF COURSE NOT!  We’re not some hipster site that appreciates figures ironically.  If a figure has everything wrong with it, it’s terrible.  It’s not quirky, kitschy or fun.  Bad is “bade”, mkay.  Always.

The figure is a train wreck of errors, aesthetic and function.  The sculpt is part Episode IV, part Episode V and part invention.  The gloves are the Episode IV gloves with the horizontal stitching despite the figure being sourced from Episode V.  The chest box is painted correctly for the Empire Strikes Back.  The belt boxes are simply in error.  The lights should be green, but Hasbro painted them blue.  In another episodic amalgamation, the chest armor is in the Episode IV configuration with the sculpted inner robes going over the armor instead of underneath it.

In the current super articulation era, we still get figures that are highly scene specific.  But by virtue of the articulation, the figures can achieve some level of scene neutrality.  This figure is not only scene specific, it’s almost frame specific and lacks the articulation to do little else for display purposes.  Well, Hasbro attempted some duel purposing with action features, but instead of doing one thing right, it fails at two.  The figure’s left hand is sculpted almost exactly to the “Come with me” line Vader says to Luke as he contemplates diving from the gantry.  Hasbro attempted to use the pose of the hand combined with a ferrous hilt and a magnet in the palm to add a play feature.  It was designed to simulate Vader using the Force to recall his saber.  The magnetic attraction is very weak.  It’s not strong enough to hold the saber when the removable blade is attached.  In the aforementioned scene, Vader’s fingers were partially curled as he pled with Luke to join him,  In order to serve the play feature, the fingers are sculpted more open.  So instead of a simulating a desperate plea for a dastardly allegiance, it looks like Vader is extending a cheesy “hi, howaya” salesman handshake. 

The plastic cape is sculpted to simulate the gale force winds what were swirling in the belly of Cloud City.  I can appreciate the attempt at dynamism, but I can’t put my finger on why the end result looks off.  I’ve always felt this way even in 2003, and it’s not because the outer cape falls off with the least provocation.  When the cape is off it reveals the jarring button to activate the other play feature on the figure.  The placement of the button is one of those unintentionally funny “laughing at” things. It serves to rotate the upper torso so Vader can slice the column on the included walkway accessory.  If a play feature can just be ignored, it’s fine.  But this is a case where between the button and the obvious gap in the midsection to facilitate the operation of the twisting action, the play feature becomes obtrusive to the aesthetics. 

The figure itself is largely “val-u-less”, but for an obvious reason, the set still has value.  This was during the era where Hasbro could cost out and include rather large mini-environment pieces.  The included “walkway” is great to punch up your Bespin duel display with your modern figures.  It’s not entirely accurate.  The entry to the gantry walkway is between the railing and the column, and there accessory does not account for this space.  But because the column can be detached from the railing, you have the display flexibility to configure it more accurately.  I’m not sure the figure would even register a score, but because of the walkway alone, I feel this set deserves a 3 out of 10.  Fortunately, the weakness of the Vader figure keeps the demand for this set low on the secondary market, so you can afford to buy it just for the walkway and toss the figure.

Click here to find this figure on Ebay

3/10 Bantha Skulls